life
Wednesday, June 30, 2004
the second test(es)
It’s disturbing and terribly romantic at the same time, and I’m still not sure exactly what was said or asked, but the gist of it was that the guy she’s dating was questioning whether or not he would sell one of his testicles to be able to afford the 3 carat (2 carat solitaire with 2 .25 friends on each side) engagement ring she’s always wanted. As random, desperate, and facetious as this topic may be, I thought it was incredibly sweet. Talk about self-sacrifice. I don’t know many who would pass (t)his testes.
After all, what is true love, if it doesn’t make you slightly demented?
the Healdsburg test
I’ve never been to Healdsburg, but everything that I’ve heard about it suggests that I would love it. I first read about it in the VIA magazine and have friends who have been and loved it. Supposedly there’s a restaurant called “ravenous” that I must go to, cute B&Bs and all the mixings for a special weekend getaway. Healdsburg is a place that I equate romantic love with…and I don’t even know why, considering the fact that I’ve never been. Does that say something about myself?
So the Healdsburg test is this question I ask myself: “Who would I want to go to Healdsburg with today?” It’s completely within the realm of possibility, yet for some reason always out of reach.
hawaiian highlights
Hawaii was a trip of many firsts and I have so many painful and pleasant memories associated with this trip that I can’t even begin to describe the spectrum of emotions...so I won’t. Instead I’ll quickly bullet point some of the key highlights to trigger emotions on days that I choose stroll down memory lane:
The wedding –
Don’t know why –
Private agony, public sympathy -
Stefcon 5 -
Hand holding whore -
Surf’s up-
24 hours
Probably one of the most exciting 24 hours of my life happened at the end of March. I went from my usual snoozing, to work, to going home, to getting vamped up to perform, to splitting my pants on stage, to singing my heart out, to being with best friends, to catching a night cap, to packing for Hawaii, and heading off to the airport to snooze on the plane, in all of 24 hours.
Sunday, June 27, 2004
the space in between
The next few blogs are recollections of events that have happened in the recent past.
Life has a way of forcing its way through your system, creating shockwaves of afterthought emotions, hopeful longings and wistful regret.
Tuesday, June 22, 2004
i believe
I think the toughest part about being in relationships/life in general is when you encounter people who in turn, make you question your own values and philosophies. It shouldn't be that you are either disappointed with another person, or that you are disappointed in yourself--but sometimes you have to ask yourself...at what point do you resign your ideal values and philosophies and start going down the pragmatic path? I think many people do...I think for many they equate this with maturity, acceptance, and a way to combat loneliness. Which for some might be ok. Which for some, might be what they consider the right thing to do. But there are really few things worse than feeling alone when you're in a relationship, and for people who like to be in relationships, that void is almost tolerable...but really shouldn't be. But we want so much to believe.
And that is what makes me so wistful. I shouldn't have to be questioned. I want to be proven right.
